Friendship That Feels Like Home
The kind of friendships worth waiting — and praying — for.
I used to wonder if I’d ever find the kind of friendships I longed for. The kind that feel like home. The kind where you can laugh until your stomach hurts so much you fall to the ground, cry openly, and still be seen.
This past year, I found them — or rather, they found me. And it’s been one of the most incredible seasons of my life.
The Gift I Never Thought I’d Receive
I never even thought I‘d be worthy of receiving the friends that I have found in the last year.
Friends that love God. Love me. Love each other.
I enjoyed moments where I felt like a child again.
Yes, there were awkward moments. There still are…
But YES, we have such fun together.
And recently, there have been more tears shed.
Friends coming and going. Seasons shifting.
And yes, those moments have been uncomfortable.
But you know what?
God provides friendship when we least expect it — but most need it.
We deeply care about one another — even if most of us don’t always admit it.
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements."
— C.S. Lewis
What Scripture Says About Friendship
"Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honour."
Romans 12:10 (ESV)
In Ancient Greek, brotherly affection or love is primarily expressed using the word "philia" (φιλία) — a love marked by deep friendship, trust, and mutual care. It’s the kind of love that grows not out of duty, but out of delight in the presence of another.
And this is what I’ve experienced.
Moments that feel light and silly.
Moments that are calm and still.
Moments where we see each other fully — and choose to stay.
Moments where I’ve been honoured not just for what I do, but for who truly I am.
To honour someone means to see them as valuable.
When we show up for one another — not just in celebration, but in silence.
When we mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice.
When we give each other space to be human.
When we speak well of one another — even when they’re not in the room.
To honour is to uphold.
To say: You matter. You’re safe here. You’re seen.
And in that kind of environment — where honour is given freely — friendship flourishes.
I have graciously received the gift of friendship and I choose to believe that that means we really love each other. And then I realise just how incredibly blessed I am.
Living in the Answered Prayers
I am reminded of all the nights I cried in my childhood bedroom and even into my teenage years longing for a sense of belonging. Longing for a group of friends to pour my heart into. Longing for people to live life with. Do life with. Go on adventures with.
And then… a few years later — I’m living in the very prayers and tears I prayed and cried for.
“Our humanity comes to its fullest bloom in giving. We become beautiful people when we give whatever we can give: a smile, a handshake, a kiss, an embrace, a word of love, a present, a part of our life...all of our life.”
― Henri J.M. Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World
The Risk and Reward of Vulnerability
Nothing in life comes easy. It will be awkward at first.
It may even be uncomfortable.
You might even rub people up the wrong way.
But with every chance you take to connect, say something silly , take a chance to be yourself — you get to connect and grow in friendship.
So put yourself out there.
Be bold.
Say yes to invitations — and don’t be afraid to extend your own. Your people will come. There will be rejection sometimes. And yes it hurts. Yes you’ll feel left out sometimes. But God doesn’t leave any of his sheep behind. He knows you long for friendship and He always provides.
Keep trying. Be receptive. Be open. Take a chance. Ask if you can join.
You Are Not an Inconvenience.
You are a Beloved Child of God.
“Every time you feel hurt, offended, or rejected, you have to dare to say to yourself: 'These feelings, strong as they may be, are not telling me the truth about myself. The truth, even though I cannot feel it right now, is that I am the chosen child of God, precious in God's eyes, called the Beloved from all eternity, and held safe in an everlasting belief.”
― Henri J.M. Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World
We all have to start somewhere.
I hope you find your people like I did mine. And I hope you love them as much I love mine. I hope you live with an open heart and are brave enough to share your story. Be seen. Be loved. And SHOW people how much you care. I pray you will listen. Be humble. Seek to understand.
“Seek to understand; not to be understood.”
— Stephen R. Covey
“Our greatest fulfillment lies in giving ourselves to others.”
― Henri J.M. Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World
"Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down their life for their friends."
John 15:13 ESV
People are messy. You are messy. I am messy.
None of us have it figured out. Have grace on each other. Have grace on yourself.
Trust that you are secure in your identity with Christ and start loving others. Your life will bloom. It will blossom. I promise you.
"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing."
1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV
Encourage your friends.
Tell them you love them.
Give feedback with grace. Receive it with humility. Apply it with wisdom and discernment. Help others when they are struggling. Give without receiving back. Receive without feeling guilty for not giving back.
Love wholeheartedly and don’t ever question your value as a child of God.
"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up."
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 NIV
You are worthy.
So if there’s anything you take from this, is to never stop praying. Never stop believing. Never stop trusting. Never doubt your worth.
You are SO worthy of that which you dream of.
It’s not always in the timeline you would like but it is SO worth the wait.
Whatever it is, the friendships, the relationship, the job, the breakthrough, the healing.
God is always taking us on a journey AND He is never finished.
What God is teaching me is that he knows better. He knows the full story. He has good plans.
And HE is the Author of my story.
It doesn’t mean I don’t show up.
It doesn’t mean I become complacent.
It means that I FULLY trust Him that in whatever the outcome is, He holds me and He is my Rock.
If you’re in the longing — keep praying.
If you’ve been blessed — say thank you.
If you’re not sure where you belong — you do. God sees you.
And He’s preparing something beautiful.
As always my friend, keep showing up. You’ve got this. <3
